Capturing the moments that follow up
I was behind the scenes today at a mini test that a friend from visiting from LA did today.
I discovered the joy of catching people when they aren't aware that they're being photographed
She's ninety and it's hard for her to see. Glaucoma has made her world blurry and the only way she can look at her gossip magazines is with a lighted magnifying glass. The glass can't help her to read though, those days are over.
Her nails bother her and the kids joke that she shouldn't let me near them - I cut everything too short. But she does want me near them and she asks if I will trim them for her. I'm nervous about this, the last thing I want to do is injure her and I don't have my reading glasses with me. I'm at the stage where I can still read my watch and a menu without glasses, but I won't sign a contract without them and I probably shouldn't pull out splinters or go after eyelashes unless they're on. I really should start to carry them with me.
Glasses or no, she wants me to help her, and I can't say no. I pick up her cosmetics bag and find her nail trimmer and nail file. "Do I have an emery board?" she asks doubtfully. Yes, sweetie, I've got it.
I gently pick up one hand and cut the end of the nail, careful not too cut it too short. She tests the length against another finger, then her cheek. "That's perfect." Carefully, slowly, I cut and file the rest of them.
Together we examine the polish and decide her nail color is still pretty - no need to repaint. She feels all of her fingertips one by one and thanks me in a more heartfelt manner than I deserve. This chokes me up a little. Small pleasures. Small gifts. Little things that matter.
At the airport, I am overcome with the same feeling I always get when I leave her. What if this is the last time we see each other? Have I made her feel loved enough? Does she know how much she matters to us?
Cassandre starts to tear up at the airport, looking at a carved stone heart "made in Utah." She wants it to remind her of this trip. To remind her of her great-grandmother. I remind her that she'll be back next month, she'll see her again soon. She nods solemnly and asks me again to please buy her the necklace. She promises to pay me back. (Who could ask for the money?)
At home Cassandre picks up the ancient candlesticks my grandfather sent to my grandmother from England right before he was shot down and killed over Germany in WWII. I am responsible for taking care of these precious memories, but I have not washed them lately and they are tarnished and dirty. Cassandre wants to clean them and together we take them apart, piece by loving piece. We wash and dry each one, noting where the silversmith has encoded "A" "B" "C" and "5" "6" "7" so we know exactly which part goes back where. Soap and water make good progress, but not enough. We buy some polish to bring the shine back.
It makes us feel connected to do this work. Hands on labor to restore some dignity to something so precious. We don't try to make it perfect, just better.
sorry for the MIA, holidays+ depression+ worrying about parents back home and retail hell.. will do a good up date soon
shot Britney from this season of ANTM
remember her?
William presents Britney America's next top model cycle 13 contestant
it's cold...
| 'Cavemen' inherit billions |
Two penniless brothers who are so poor they live in a cave could be set to inherit a share of a £4 billion fortune.

Zsolt and Geza Peladi live in the cave outside Budapest, Hungary, and sell scrap they find on the street for pennies.
Now they and a sister who lives in America are said to be on the verge of inheriting their grandmother's massive fortune after a life of poverty.
They learned of their good fortune after homelessness charity workers in Hungary were contacted by lawyers handling the estate of the brothers' maternal grandmother who died recently in Baden-Wurttenberg, Germany.
"We knew our mother came from a wealthy family but she was a difficult person and severed ties with them, and then later abandoned us and we lost touch with her and our father until she eventually died," said Geza, 43.
Under German law however direct descendents are automatically entitled to a share of any estate.
Geza added: "If this all works out it will certainly make up for the life we have had until now - all we really had was each other - no women would look at us living in a cave.
"But with money maybe we can find a partner - and finally have a normal life. We don't know yet if she even told our grandmother about us - I understand it was only while they were carrying out genealogical research that lawyers found we existed."
Volunteer Gyula Balazs Csaszar - who works for Budapest's Maltans charity - told ATV television: "We were contacted by a lawyer asking us to find the brothers. He claimed he could help their lives with a large sum of money."
The grandmother's name was not revealed to prevent fraudsters trying to cash in on the inheritance but a spokesman for the legal firm said: "We know who we need to speak to and that is the two brothers who we are pretty sure are the grandchildren - there is no need for anyone else to be informed."
Now the brothers are obtaining copies of their mother's death certificate and proof of their family connection before travelling to Germany to claim their inheritance.
Had to upload it to youtube this time!
At least his bedding will be clean soon, even if he isn't....
Reasons I Am Buying Less At Trader Joe's
or
Items Trader Joe's Has (Apparently) Discontinued
in no particular order other than the most heartbreaking is first (also you might notice a theme)
- Mexican Hot Cocoa Cookies--I told the cashier last year that I loved these so much I wanted to marry them. Then I wrote Trader Joe's and told them that, and they said they were a seasonal item. And they didn't bring them back this season. I want to punch them in the face for this alone.
- Pierogies--these had become rather a staple for me over the last year or 2. I'm not sure if they have been discontinued but I haven't seen any in a few months.
Hot chocolate mix in the round blue can--okay, they have the sipping chocolate which is good, and this one I can live without but still, just another turn of the thumbscrew. Saw it 12/10 on the shelf.- Chocolate yogurt--the kind with the real cocoa in the bottom that you mixed up and it was all delicious and shit, not that Eurotrash crap in the smaller container they try to shove off on you.
- Cookies with Perks--the chocolate chip cookes with espresso chips (or espresso flavored cookies with chocolate chips?). Haven't seen them since probably last winter or spring. Bastards.
- Milk chocolate cocoa almonds (are you getting the theme yet?)--now they have the black cocoa almonds, and they are pretty good, though unless you eat them with a spoon or chopsticks it's like you just read 100,000 newspapers (okay, newspapers that taste like chocolate, but still, it's messy!) Now---90% of the time I prefer dark chocolate, but this is one of the few exceptions (one of the others is the milk chocolate covered McVitie's digestive biscuits which I haven't had in years but I would probably sell a kidney for a packet right about tomorrow). Would it be SO WRONG to have both?
- I didn't check for it this time because I bought some at the regular supermarket since I couldn't find it at Trader Joe's the last couple times, but if they have discontinued their frozen broccoli florets I'm gonna bust up the joint.
- I don't think they have discontinued them (YET) but their sea salt brownies were really delicious until they lightened up on the sea salt. Now they are just bland.
- I didn't see the little chocolate mint cookie clusters. They were so good that I can't even remember what they were. They were in a brown and dark pink round container, like a pint of ice cream, like Thin Mints or something, all crumbled up and covered in chocolate, maybe?
- Also I haven't seen the dark chocolate toffee squares I've become rather addicted to, in a while. I bought some in September to bring on vacation. I have one left in front of me.
There are probably other things but it's probably like regular food that doesn't stand out in my mind like chocolate stuff. I will add things as I recall them. I know my neighbor was pissed about some croissants they discontinued, maybe almond croissants.
They are discontinuing stuff I like but not replacing them with anything as good or better. Are my tastes that eclectic? Do all the rest of the Trader Joe's customers have bland ass taste?
Oh--the first thing I ever had from Trader Joe's, before I lived near one, were these little chocolate animal cracker type cookies (my sister had them at her house when I was babysitting once and I wanted to eat the whole thing). They weren't chocolate covered or anything, they were like chocolate butter cookies that melted in your mouth. And they replaced them with something BLAND.
I seriously was planning on buying 10 boxes of those Mexican Hot Cocoa Cookies. And next trip I would have bought 10 more. I'm completely serious. I was going to stock up so I could have them at least through the spring. Or till New Year's. Or till I OD'ed on them, or at least till I vomited.
Quit breaking my heart, Trader Joe. You are getting to be evil and sadistic, getting me hooked on this stuff and then yanking them out from under me, without warning, before I can stock up and buy out every store in the area.

















